SEDA-GIVE

Happy USA Weekend!!!

2009-07-02T20:23:00.002-05:00

Picked a fine time to return to posting...

..Holiday weekend and all...STUF to do...
People to see...FOOD to COOK...carnage and chaos on my agenda...

HAVE a happy and SAFE independence day holiday...

I Got Some Splain'in To Do...

2009-07-02T19:54:00.002-05:00

I'm a bad blogger...BAD, BAD, BAD!!!

A thousand pardons for my MIA status...

I have been preoccupied with LIFE...(is that a 4 letter word?)

...WORK...(another 4 letter word)...

...KIDS....(oops...there I go again)...

...CRAP, STUF, SH!T, POOP...

...I'm on a ROLL...(do you see a pattern here?????)

WELL, I hope you've enjoyed the peace and quiet while it lasted...because its over BITCHES!!!! I'm back and I've got a HECK of a lot of venting to do......ready or not...here I COME!!!!!

Brown Bag Surprise...

2009-03-06T19:55:00.003-06:00

...Wow, thanks Mom....my favorite!!!

Do I eat it or name it?!?!?!?!

Hey, look what followed me home from school today!!!

Can I keep it?....Pleeeeeze?!?!?!?!?!

No Tongue Sandwich on the Menu?

2009-03-06T19:28:00.004-06:00

I guess when a "Brit" gets a hanker'in for a tongue sandwich...

that craving must be satisfied or "Birthday Boy" gets Bit!!!

Birthday Boy's comment: "Pbthspspsps!!!"

Hey Anobiter...Check this out!!!

2009-03-06T18:53:00.006-06:00

Tramp Stamp Barbie!!!

Hmmmmm...

maybe Barbie should have some body piercings too...

where shall we start?

(Edit: Oops, old news to you...you "scooped" me by 22 hours)

Pilfer My Melons??????

2009-02-21T11:49:00.000-06:00

Don't Even Think About It!!!!

This Goes Out 2 Mr. Give...

2009-02-21T11:38:00.003-06:00

...thank you for all the love & labor you have poured into our garden project!!! Not to mention the natural fertilizer...
I bet we grow the biggest melons in the neighborhood & our cucumbers will have such girth we will only be able to pickle one to a jar... MR. GIVE, U ROCK!!!

R U Stimulated?

2009-02-21T11:32:00.001-06:00

The only thing stimulated by the "Stimulus Package" is my bowels!!!

Taking it personally...

2009-02-21T11:11:00.003-06:00

Our daughter was laid-off from Alcon Laboratories last week...along with 249 other unsuspecting souls…this was quite a shock to everyone due to this being the first lay-off to ever be implemented at Alcon, they say it is due to foreign competition…

Alcon hired an outside consultant firm to come in and walk the “victims” through four days of classes on how to deal with the situation, revamp your resume and sign-up for unemployment.

The classes were held at a hotel located just across the highway from Alcon so that when the “victims” went to and from class they were able to look across the highway at their old place of employment and scream!!!!
THAT IS MY PINK STREAMLINE STAPLER!!!!

Anyone in need of a very talented Executive Administrative Assistant with two young-uns to support?

Shall we make an "Ass-umption"..

2009-02-21T11:02:00.002-06:00

...and assume that he has put more than just his foot in his mouth during these past few weeks? Five dollar foot-long anyone?

2 Snooze, or Not 2 Snooze...

2009-02-09T20:46:00.002-06:00

...that is the question...
I have my alarm set for 5am...
I religiously "Snooze" in until 5:40am...at 10 minute intervals....
Is this healthy??? I don't know & I don't care....I feel all the better for it...how about you???

The Perfect Storm?!?!?!?!?

2009-02-09T20:12:00.004-06:00

The weather people predicted rain Sunday night...YES!!! We need IT!!!

Got my hopes up....just to be woken up at 3am Monday morning with the sounds of rainfall and fierce winds... We got exactly .20 inches of precipitation with 70 mile an hour winds!!! Eeeeeeeekkkkk!!!

We have a 100 year old working barn with so much character it is totally awesome...however, it is vertically challenged...it is on its last leg (so to speak)....it is well ventilated and we winterize it with tarps....the animals go inside just long enough to eat....then they are "out o'here"...they may be animals...but they are not stupid!

After the winds last night we were afraid to look at the damage...so, prior to sunrise...Mr. Give drives out to the barn and shines his headlights on the barn prior to leaving for work...immediately he notices that we are missing 3 metal roof panels..."Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore...

When I leave for work the sun has risen and I notice that a huge oak branch is laying in the back yard...shingles litter the yard...the antique metal chairs on the front porch are in disarray...a huge, heavy clay pot has been thrown off the front porch and is broken on the front lawn...the glass humming bird feeders hanging on the porch survived...the miniature windmill is smashed to smithereens...apparently the "wind-dado" is selective in it's path of destruction!!!

Our theory has been....if the barn survives...so shall we!!! Well, the odds are narrowing...I say it is time to replace the barn!!! Its all in the timing, as the saying goes...we need to get ahead of the damage curve...or will FEMA come to our rescue...NOT....I am looking at plans as I type...

Rain Already ! ! !

2009-02-08T13:51:00.003-06:00

...I walked out to the barn a few hours ago to give the idiots some hay and a few sprinkles fell upon my face...

...by the time I walked back to the house....no sprinkles...no nothing!!!

WHAT A TEASE!!!

Problem Solved ! ! !

2009-02-08T13:24:00.008-06:00

This Stimulus Package Has It All ! ! !

For the Gentlemen....

and for the Ladies...

...this package is affordable and will put a smile on every taxpayers face!!!

Shall we put it up for vote?!?!?!?!?!?

OK...maybe not....I'll go to my room now...

D O N E ! ! !

2009-02-08T12:57:00.003-06:00

The 2008 taxes...they are DONE!!! Ready to be delivered to the CPA!!!

YEA!!!!! I'm Free....I can come out and play now....

I don't know why I was so concerned about getting our taxes taken care of...

it seems the "vogue" thing these days is to not pay them at all...

I wonder how that would work out for little ole "Josey the small ag exempt" lay-person...

I wonder if I could sleep at night knowing I had not paid my fair share...

especially since I would be sleeping in a cell with my new girlfriend to keep me warm...

I'm just say'in...

Var-mints....

2009-01-27T18:45:00.004-06:00

...will they ever learn???? I can't even pet the puppets because they are stinky-stinky-pew-pew-pew!!! Dogs are very affectionate...they run up to greet you when you get home and all they want is a little rubb'in...but I can't touch them or I will smell like the PePe....don't get me wrong, I appreciate that they are just doing their jobs and protecting us and the property from rabid vermin, but how can I show my appreciation from afar??? We give them food, water, treats, a warm place to sleep [outside cause they are stinky], but we can't have any one-on-one and they don't understand when they come running-up, wagging their tails all excited and my reaction is PU!!! Because if I pet them, I smell like them!!! So I pet them on the least likely spot to have been sprayed, throw them a treat and run inside...I'm not ungrateful for their services, but I just can't stand the stench!!!

Its A Freak'in Litter!!!

2009-01-27T18:26:00.004-06:00

Mr. Give and I had to put two off-springs through puberty...that means the latest fashions, all the activities, the sporting events, the camps, the uniforms, the fundraisers, braces, first concerts, school dances, sweet sixteens, cars, stereos, cell phones, ipods, x-boxes, proms, senior trips, graduation parties, college classes, showers, marriage, more graduation parties...ahahahhahahahahhaha!!!

TIMES EIGHT....SOMEBODY JUST SHOOT ME!!!!!

THE SEX HAD BETTER BEEN REALLY, REALLY, REALLY,GOOD!!! Because they won't have the time or the energy to have a repeat performance!!!

My Attitude...

2009-01-27T18:17:00.004-06:00

...ran across (no pun intended) this pix and thought....

I Can Relate!!!! Ever have one of those dayz???

I Hate Personal Trainers....

2009-01-24T14:58:00.002-06:00

...getting paid to work out...

...walking around looking all buff

...behaving like a Drill Sergeant while in session...

...working out in-between sessions, while looking at us amateurs with pity, out of the corner of their eyes...

I know what they are thinking...

"Just look at that idiot, at what point did you give up and just let yourself go?" "Spandex is made for me....not you" "Is that all the weight you can do?" "Gawd, that's not how your supposed to use that machine, its called the Ab Crunch not the Boobie Crunch" "Move over and pay a professional to show you how its done" "Freak’ in Amateur" "Waste of space in the gym"

...OK, I don't hate them....really....I'm jealous!!!!
Can I change careers in the middle of the game?

My Crotch Hurts!!!!

2009-01-24T14:45:00.003-06:00

Yes, you heard me correctly....MY CROTCH HURTS!!!!

Last week I actually went to the gym....and picked up my membership card.

A few days later I went to the gym again...to take a tour.

The next day I went back to the gym....to get an assessment.

[that was painful]

But for the last three days....in a row....I went to the gym...and actually worked out!!!
Thus having an opportunity to tune on every body part so that my entire being is screaming at me...none so loudly as my CROTCH!!!!! Thursday I worked on my outer & inner thigh areas. OUCH!!!!

I'm walking like the Duke [John Wayne] and there is no way I'm getting on my horse this weekend....you would hear the screams plumb into Tarrant County!!!

Sasha, Malia Dolls Miff First Lady...

2009-01-24T14:05:00.002-06:00

They’ve been in the White House less than a week, but the first daughters have already been co-opted by marketers — and Michelle Obama isn’t happy about it.

Maybe If I'm Really Good This Year, Santa Will Put One Of These...

2009-01-21T22:22:00.010-06:00

ARE WE TOO OLD TO DRIVE THIS CAR?

Concept car that we are probably too old to drive! NO JOKE!The new Benz - Very different....really different!
This is the new Mercedes Benz SCL600

That's not what is different about it.

That either...

.....and now for the 'really different' part:

Here is what is different...

No steering wheel, you drive it with a joystick. No pedals either. Can you drive with a joystick? Your kids and grandkids probably can. The influence of video games in our lives has really arrived, wouldn't you say? SCARY THOUGHT THAT NOW A 7-YEAR-OLD COULD STEAL YOUR CAR AND PROBABLY DRIVE IT BETTER THAN YOU.

I'm Bode-If-Fide...

2009-01-21T22:19:00.003-06:00

I attended my first CPR training class today...

I know just enough to be dangerous!!!

From My Daughter...Such A Tragedy...

2009-01-21T21:55:00.004-06:00

This is one of my high school friend's family. Her name is Vanessa. This story touches my heart in a special place, because it is of her son, Keaton. He is a happy healthy big boy, just like my little Hudson.
Keaton passed away just one week before his first Christmas. He was the family's third child, and first boy. Since I know the mother, I can tell you she is so active and involved in the children's lives. She is one proud momma as well, as she should be! I couldn't imagine the things this family is enduring at this point, and the things they have had to encounter along this process.
Please read this story, it was published in the Keller Citizen: http://www.kellercitizen.com/101/story/11921.html

If there is any way you can help this family, know that they would greatly appreciate it. As a mother, I could not fathom needing to fund my child's funeral, pick out their favorite outfit, or put them to rest. Also know, that your prayers, are felt by the family, and they still need them, as this is an ongoing process for the entire family; Mother: Vanessa, Father: Dave, Sisters: Madelyn and Ashlyn.
This is also something she wrote, from her personal blog.
1). We can ALWAYS use thoughts and prayers. This is still new to my family and we are ALL still going through a hard time! Especially the girls. We still cannot believe this is happening to us. We are just trying our best to adjust and be able to do the daily things that have to be done in life without having a break down over Bubba.

2). We are deeply still in need of donations at any Wells Fargo by mentioning the Fund name. The Keaton Huebner Memorial Fund is desperately needing funds to help pay for funeral expenses. He deserves the Best and right now he is in a temporary mausoleum crypt but he needs to desperately be moved in Order to honor his being the Best! I can't thank everyone enough who has donated in one way or another.

If you cannot donate please forward this need to all of your family and friends because maybe they can. If anyone works for a corporate business they most likely have Charity donations in their budget. Most usually have to donate so much per year, it's just a matter of where they will donate so please help me get the word out!!! Much Love to you ALL! In lieu of flowers the family requests that contributions in his memory be made to the Keaton Huebner Memorial Fund at any Wells Fargo location, to assist with funeral expenses. Our Family could really use the donations for the funeral expenses. We still have sooooo much to pay. If you can donate every dollar counts, whether you donate one dollar or a thousand dollars, our family asks for your help. Keaton Deserves it for sure!!!!

The Name Game...

2009-01-20T19:06:00.001-06:00

I HATE Daytime TV!!!!!!

2009-01-19T14:58:00.003-06:00

The TV is on in the other room for background noise....

NO I don't want a career change....

NO I don't want to sue anyone...

NO I don't want to sell you my settlement so I can have MY money NOW...

NO I don't need to confirm my baby daddy....

Ahahahahahahahhahaha....

...time to plug in some tunes before I eat a bullet...[sick picture huh]

Adolf Hitler Campbell Removed From Parent's Home

2009-01-19T14:40:00.002-06:00

The New Jersey Division of Youth & Family Services have removed little Adolf and his younger siblings; JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler from their loving white supremacists home last week after the department had received NO reports of neglect or abuse....Hmmmmm....

I don't agree with the parents choice of names, but I also don't agree that it is grounds for government intervention...

First the kid doesn't get his special store-made birthday cake and now this....if his luck doesn't change quick, he may end up as messed up as his namesake!!!

It Pays To Be Chaste...

2009-01-19T13:58:00.003-06:00

Natalie Dylan, 22, claims her offer of a one-night stand has persuaded 10,000 men to bid for sex with her.
Last September, when her auction came to light, she had received bids up to $243,000 but since then interest in her has rocketed.
"I think me and the person I do it with will both profit greatly from the deal."
She added: "It's shocking that men will pay so much for someone's virginity, which isn't even prized so highly anymore."

Maybe I should schedule an appointment with the labia doctor and pay for my early retirement! SHeeeeeeSH!!!!!!!!!

Time to Feed...

2009-01-18T17:02:00.002-06:00

...the natives are restless...

Rules...

2009-01-18T16:58:00.000-06:00

...when will it ever end????

Do Baggy Pants Drive You Nuts???

2009-01-18T16:54:00.000-06:00

I'm just say'in.....

No Comment...

2009-01-18T16:31:00.000-06:00

Awkward...

2009-01-18T16:27:00.004-06:00

I had a guy approach me in a restaurant the other day and greet me like an old friend...then he realized that I was not who he thought I was...heeheehee

I was like....Hey, good to see you too....How's the family....Did you guys have a great Christmas...The look on his face was priceless...

Financial Advise

2009-01-18T14:45:00.002-06:00

With tax time around the corner, I thought I would pass on some very important facts from my financial advisor...

Yesterday's Truths ARE Today's Truths

2009-01-18T14:28:00.003-06:00

John Kennedy once said to a assembled group of scholars in the White House * I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House - with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone."

The quotes below could prove his point.

When we get piled upon one another in large cities, as in Europe, we shall become as corrupt as Europe. - Thomas Jefferson

The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not. - Thomas Jefferson

It is incumbent on every generation to pay its own debts as it goes. A principle which if acted on would save one-half the wars of the world. - Thomas Jefferson

I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them. - Thomas Jefferson

My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms. - Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. - Thomas Jefferson

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

Very Interesting Quote:
In light of the present financial crisis, it's interesting to read what Thomas Jefferson said in 1802:
Banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around the banks will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered.

Doesn't this sound eerily familiar to what is happening in America today?

New Tire Design by Michelin

2009-01-18T14:10:00.002-06:00

You guys may have already seen these...

These tires are airless and are scheduled to be out on the market very soon.

The bad news for law enforcement is that spike strips will not work on these.

Just think of the impact on existing technology:

A. no more air valves...

B. no more air compressors at gas stations...

C. no more repair kits...

D. no more flats...

These are actual pictures taken in the South Carolina plant of Michelin

Where Will You Be Tuesday?

2009-01-18T13:18:00.004-06:00

Tomorrow is a holiday for our office, but I will be at work Tuesday just like all Inauguration Days before this one.

However, we will have one department with no representation due to both employees taking the day off.

I wonder if we are the only office to experience this type of worker shortage…

Barbies For Anobiter...

2009-01-17T19:50:00.007-06:00

Is this not the most disturbing toy ever...or is it just me?

Clearance priced at only $21....

price does not include the therapy expenses that will be required for your little girl in the future...

OK....

Now I'm dating myself....but this one is brilliant...

The Carol Burnett Barbie in the

"Gone With The Wind" Skit

Too Funny!!!

TO Torture or NOT to Torture...

2009-01-16T19:36:00.004-06:00

That is the question...easy to answer when one sits in the comfort of an American home......on the frontline.....different story...and who keeps who safe....who are we to say....we don't see what they see....we don't experience what they experience...somebody has to do the dirty work... and we sit in our easy chair and judge...the world reality is ugly and sometimes, so are the solutions...unless you are willing to put on the uniform and take the risk...DON'T JUDGE!!!

Andrew Wyeth...Thank You!!!

2009-01-16T18:56:00.002-06:00

one of my favorite artist died today at the age of 91...I have a print of this painting hanging in my home and every time I look at it I have to smile...

What a talent...to create something that a total stranger would proudly display in their own home...I've created things that my own family has lost or misplaced [secretly thrown away]...

I think I would like to live to be in my 90's...my GrandMa is going to turn 94 this year so it could happen...but then again, that generation is a whole different breed...

I'm probably too full of preservatives...or red dye number 98...or something...

Air Biscuit Raid!!!!

2009-01-14T18:57:00.003-06:00

The Munster Kitty loves to sit in my lap as I type...so here I sit, minding my own business, when all of a sudden....WHAT IS THAT SMELL.....wafting, wafting, wafting.....OH, MY GAWD!!!!!

Munster Kitty has just dusted me off!!!! Again!!!! What the heck does that cat eat that could turn so rotten within it's system....it's just unreal!!!!

...The Famous Flying Flatulence Feline....sails across the room...and it's thinking....WHAT??????

Stupid Is As Stupid Does...

2009-01-14T18:49:00.003-06:00

They did it again!!!

You would think that after half a dozen episodes those stupid dogs would learn not to chase the black kitty with the pretty white stripe!!!!

PEEEEEEEE-UUUUUUUUUU

The Salt Lick...

2009-01-14T17:36:00.003-06:00

I dropped my clothes off at the drycleaners this morning and the owner greeted me wearing Carhartt bib overalls...she looked cute and comfortable. I sometimes wish I had a job where I could dress like that...it would save me a bundle in dry-cleaning expenses...maybe I should open a feed store...I would hire good lookin young people and we would all dress like the cast of Hee-Haw....maybe a topless feed store....girls on odd numbered days and guys on even numbered days...Hmmmmmm....what would I call it?????

Awesome!!!

2009-01-13T23:10:00.003-06:00

I saw a bald eagle flying over the lake in front of our house last weekend...
I was filling up the horse trough in the front pasture, bored as hell...
when I heard the ducks on the lake raising a ruckus...I looked up and saw a bald eagle soaring above the lake, hunting...with three buzzards in it's wake...looking for leftovers. What an awesome sight...no wonder our forefathers chose this bird to be our national symbol...a turkey, quail or peacock just wouldn't do....

Sleepless...

2009-01-13T22:46:00.001-06:00

I took a diet pill this afternoon around 3:30...

I CAN'T SLEEP!!!

Man-ty Hose...

2009-01-13T19:27:00.001-06:00

...for added warmth and comfort in these cold winter nights...

I think I will get Mr. Give a pair so he can keep cozy while mucking the barn...

he will be the envy of Montague County!!!

Honey Do...

2009-01-13T19:19:00.002-06:00

Mr. Give was performing a "honey-do" and repairing a kitchen cabinet for me...less than a minute later, the cabinet was still broken but Mr. Gives fingers [on both hands I might add] were super glued together...the only free finger was his middle one on his right hand which he used to tell me I was number one!!!!!

Yes Ladys.....he is all mine!!!!

Looks Just Like....

2009-01-13T19:08:00.003-06:00

...nuff said....

We Got A Live One!!!

2009-01-10T14:13:00.003-06:00

Our A/C went out last summer so we had a couple of 100+ degree days that we had to endure before we could get the new system installed...

Mr. Give pulled this out of the back of the pantry today...

Stand back, I think its going to blow...

Couple juiced to death in North Texas...

More at 11...

Only the Strong (or Stupid) Survive...

2009-01-10T13:03:00.004-06:00

...10 years ago, Mr. Give lost a bet with a co-worker and his payoff was to dye his hair any color the winner chose...the choice was jet black.

So Mr. Give skips into his local Sally's Beauty Supply and brings home some hair dye. His hair came out so jet black it had a blue/black sheen to it...the next day was one of the hottest days that summer and his jet black hair radiated the heat strait to the few brain cells he had left and made him so miserable that he went to the winner and said, "Any color....any color but black!!!"....so after much thought and guffaws the winner said, "OK, dye it white"...ecstatic with relief, Mr. Give again skips into his local beauty supply and purchased the blue stuff that turns your hair white.

The next day, Mr. Give goes to work with hair the color of Harley Davison ORANGE!!! heeheehee...so back he goes for more bluing...

I came home from work, opened the front door and was just about knocked down by the peroxide aroma coming from my home...he was determined to turn his orange hair to white by the next morning...he even had the product on his facial hair...then I noticed something protruding from both nostrils...I said "Not the nose hairs too?!?!?!?" Come to find out, he had cotton plugs in his nose because he couldn't stand the smell either!!!

This pix shows what I had to be seen with in public for the next 6 months…and as if that wasn’t enough…our teenaged son thought that it was so cool, he dyed his hair white too…

...its memories like this that keep the spark in our 18 year relationship…never a dull moment!!!

Brrrrrrrr!!!

2009-01-05T15:46:00.002-06:00

The horse and mule are covered in mud, anything to stay warm...

The barn kitties came running to greet me with ice laden whiskers...

These stupid monster kitties in the house don't realize just how good they've got it!!! They keep testing me and they just might find out!!!...Frozen Puss Pops Anyone....heeheehee

Broke In My New Mud Boots!!!

2009-01-05T15:33:00.002-06:00

I Got My New Mud Boots Muddy Today!!!
I've been dying to wear these since Christmas, but Mr. Give wouldn't let me wear them outside unless it was muddy...so I went slip'n & slide'n out at the barn as soon as I got home this afternoon!!!

The animals were look'n at me kinda funny....I don't know if it was because I was acting like an idiot or because I looked like one?!?!?!?!?

Still Love Snow Dayz...

2009-01-05T15:20:00.003-06:00

Lived in Kansas as a kid and used to love the days we were snowed in and couldn't go to school....

I was told to go home at 1pm today due to the frozen rain...

First sign of trouble was just north of Decatur by the rest area....SUV off in the ditch...

then north of Alvord...five vehicles off of the road at the overpasses...

Then an 18 wheeler comes barreling up on my @ss at a curved overpass of all places!!!

Got on the hotline to God real quick!!!! Dumb*sses!!!!

Don't Forget...

2009-01-01T15:09:00.003-06:00

to eat some black-eye peas today!!!

I just cooked some up in the pressure cooker and scared the poo out of the camo kitty [insert evil laugh]

(Camo is the color of a bobcat and stays hid out in the house)

Mr. Give had just gotten Camo out of her hiding place and settled down in the family room when the pressure cooker started hissing....

Camo peeled out so fast I think Mr. Give will need stitches...

I hope the peas are worth the blood letting...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2009-01-01T14:33:00.005-06:00

NO This Isn't Me!!!!!

heeheehee

Mr. Give & I were at home, safely passed out on our couch where we couldn't hurt ourselves or any innocent bystanders...

We have learned from years of experience...

Hope you all had a safe and happy New Year celebration and none of you ended up starring in your own Kodak moment!!!

Wishing you and yours a happy & prosperous New Year!!!

Blue Men...

2008-12-28T18:18:00.004-06:00

...if you haven't seen them...

you should...

...modern day Pink Floyd...

....you should tune-in....

OK.....I GIVE...."UNCLE"...

2008-12-28T17:21:00.007-06:00

....I know when I'm out-numbered...

Mr. Give thought that the Munster kitty needed a playmate....so....
we met up with some friends [am beginning to rethink that relationship]
to pick up a cute little kitten pal...by the time we left we had two....
yes I said 2 (TWO) little friends....

my girlfriend put the second one in the carrier with the first...and the fight was on....
we thought that one of them pooped itself but thank goodness it was just an air bomb...
so we borrowed a second carrier so that they would both arrive home alive.

We got to the house and put the carriers on the floor so that the Munster could get acquainted...
all was well with the smaller of the guests so we let "IT" out to "play"...
after numerous b*tch slaps...they are getting along just swell...

so....we decide to let the larger companion out of it's cell....

...it ran under my bed and we haven't seen it since...

it IS somewhere in this house, but heck if we can find it!!!

If it poops under my bed....I'm going to be sooooo un-pleased!!!!!

So 4 hours later...stealth Kitty is still out there...lurking...waiting...

...such a strange feeling when you know you have a critter laying in wait....

...right in your very own home....

...to be continued....(if we live through the night)...

Jealous, Jealous, Jealous...

2008-12-27T15:09:00.006-06:00

Mr. Give gave me a belated Christmas gift this morning...

A 12" WOODIE ! ! ! ! Woo-Hoo ! ! ! ! !

This is a Woodie of my very own...

I can hug it and squeeze it and pet it and love it...

My very own Woodie will keep me company on those cold winter nights when Mr. Give is away...

My very own Woodie comes complete with it's own hat to protect it's soft little head...

and the hat is ribbed...

Just one problem....I've never had a Woodie of my very own...

I'm not sure where I should put it....Any Suggestions????

...You Got A Friend In Me...You Got A Friend In Me...

...Ride Woodie, Ride...

Stock'in Stuffer

2008-12-25T15:11:00.003-06:00

...is fix'in to get stuffed someplace else...

"Guitar Idol" air guitar play-thing has turned Mr. Give into a loon...

...if I hear "Jumpin' Jack Flash" one more time...

somebody is going to find himself at the bottom of the well...

...he even has the "munster" do'in it!!!

KAT-A-TUDE

2008-12-25T14:34:00.006-06:00

This totally captures the Kat-A-Tude at my house!!!

Stupid Kitty!!!

No More Mz NiceGuy

2008-12-25T13:40:00.008-06:00

I Pity Da Varmint!!!

All Trespassers Beware!!!

I am reclaiming the barn!!!

Flashlight strong enough to burn retina [check]

Paisley Print Mud Boots [check]

Duel ARs with Full Clips

[check] [check] [check] & [check]

Thanks Mr. Give, I think I'm well equipped to hold down the Fort should you have to go out of town again...

The Gift That Keeps On Giving...

2008-12-25T12:16:00.003-06:00

Mr. Give thinks that our satanic serial scratch-er needs a playmate….

Guess what we are getting this afternoon…."The Horror"

What could I have done to deserve this?

Ladies & Gentlemen...

2008-12-22T19:47:00.002-06:00

...and now the main event....

Gotta Go!!!!

Chef Give...

2008-12-22T19:44:00.001-06:00

Mr. Give got a little creative in the kitchen...

and didn't burn down the house!!!

Back off ladies.....he is all mine!!!

Its MY birthday...

2008-12-22T19:40:00.001-06:00

and Mr. Give wanted to "role-play"...

time to upgrade the jumpsuit!!!

Happy Birthday Little Bro...

2008-12-02T20:06:00.002-06:00

I hope you like your present...

'cause December birthdays SUCK!!!

(I saved the receipt, just in case it is the wrong size)

...and the winner is...

2008-12-02T19:45:00.001-06:00

I'm truley "a-skared" to decorate my home for Christmas...

Why????

Need you ask???

"The Horror..."

N I G H T M A R E...

2008-12-02T19:34:00.003-06:00

Today was the day to decorate the office for Christmas...ARGH!!!

Trying to get more than one woman to agree on a decorating theme is a freak’in nightmare.

Therefore, I opted out on the "Decor Committee" and just sat back and enjoyed the show..."Priceless"...heeheehee

Hockey - The Gentleman's Sport

2008-12-02T19:00:00.006-06:00

Apparently you can stick someone in the sack...
but you better not talk smack.

Dallas Stars Sean Avery has been suspended indefinitely for comments made in Calgary this afternoon...
resulting in the Stars losing a key player for tonight's game....one game, understandable... but suspended indefinitely???
What he did would be considered "elementary" in any other sports association...he would have been given a bonus for increasing the television viewing stats, yeck, I would have rushed home from work just to witness the fall-out between those two, "fight after school" on ice!!

I'm just not feeling it...

2008-12-01T20:05:00.003-06:00

It's the 1st day of December

and I am soooo

not ready for Christmas!!!

Open Carry Petition

2008-12-01T18:54:00.002-06:00

Rriiigghhtt.....

That way I can be the first one that the bad guy (with the concealed handgun) will opt to take out of the equation...

Popped My Cherry ! ! !

2008-11-30T19:33:00.004-06:00

I was a "Black Friday" virgin...until...

[insert scary movie music - "reek-reek-reek-reek"]

it was the most painful experience of my life!!!

...and I've had two kids, been thrown from numerous horses, kicked by a mule (twice), grew up being the only girl in the family...I've had one broken bone & numerous black eyes....I'm not what you would call a "girly-girl"...but that was the worst experience of my life....by far...

I thought "It's only shopping...how bad can it be?"

OH MY GAWD!!!!! NEVER AGAIN!!!!! NEVER, EVER, EVER!!!! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!!!!

T r a d i t i o n ! ! !

2008-11-30T18:48:00.003-06:00

Time to watch me some "Planes Trains and Automobiles"

Hope ya'll had a wonderful holiday weekend and made some beautiful family memories...

Missed you Mr. Give...look'in forward to some pillow-talk...SG

Glass Half Full...

2008-11-30T18:16:00.004-06:00

Stupid Lug nuts...Jumped up and down on the four-way and still couldn't bust'em loose...Had to use the old "Damsel in Distress" card...

On the upside...
I did learn to use the hydraulic jack AND the mondo compressor!!! SWEET!!!

...speaking of feeding time...

2008-11-30T17:25:00.001-06:00

Come on "Rocky"

I'm Ready To Rumble!!!

I am now "ONE" with the "COON"

2008-11-30T16:38:00.004-06:00

I went shopping with my daughter last weekend and didn't get home until 9:30pm. Man were the animals pissed. They were standing out at the barn tapping their hooves and checking the time...I was late for feeding. So, rather than do something sensible like stop at the house to change clothes and get a weapon just in case a varmint was about...I drove strait to the barn, shined the car headlights into the breezeway and got to work. I fed the horse and the mule, got into the second feed barrel to take care of the dogs and cats, was just locking the lid down when I heard a ruckus right above my head...(a little too early for Santa)...it sounded like a board was coming down on my head...before I could look up to see what the ruckus was...something hit me smack on the head, RIGHT ON MY FREAK'IN HEAD PEOPLE...it rolled onto my left shoulder, down my arm and came to a thud at my feet...it was the biggest raccoon I had ever seen...
Needless to say...the coon & I puddled at the same time, same place...
We just got 12 guineas which are cooped up in the East side of the barn...the raccoon was scaling a board that runs along the top of the wall dividing the rooms on the West side of the barn, the board runs out into the breezeway approx. 18" then stops for some stupid reason...I happened to be standing right under the end of the board when the raccoon walked right off the end of it, falling to certain death if not for my hard head breaking it's fall...my Indian name shall now be…
“Saving Coon@ss“…or…”Coon Catcher”…or maybe…“Cavorting With Coons”

B O O B I E S ! ! !

2008-11-27T07:54:00.004-06:00

Happy Turkey Day Mr. Give!!!

Here's a "Boobie" shot just for you!

Loving & Missing You...SG xxxooo

...& your thinking...

2008-11-25T20:47:00.002-06:00

YEA!!!!

No Munster Kitty Post....

Rest Assured....

"It" is still among us...

Hey Now...

2008-11-25T20:38:00.004-06:00

Today I was told that I reminded someone of a "Hey Now" pix on Liberal Weenie's website...that left me very confused...was that a compliment?....or am I a slut?????

I HATE DIAL UP!!!

2008-11-25T20:21:00.003-06:00

I've been kicked off 3 times within the last hour...

I'm growing old sitting here, waiting to connect,
waiting to download, losing precious moments...

I had a great story to share with you about my weekend...but nevermind...

I've had it...can't standz no more...LATER!!!

Green Acres Is The Place To Be....Farm Liv'in Is The Life For Me...

Bzzzzzzzz

2008-11-25T20:09:00.003-06:00

...those mixer trucks with the swirl painted on the tank, make me smile...

OK, so I'm easily amused!!!

...is her stinger protruding?

Careful...you'll put your eye out!

What Tha?!?!?!?

2008-11-25T19:59:00.003-06:00

...a Miracle Bra can only do so much...

I would sue for false advertising!!!

...and whats with all the wire hangers in the closet?

Mommie Dearest will be very upset...

Frozen Puss Pop...

2008-11-19T20:19:00.004-06:00

...doesn't this ferocious feline know that this is the wrong time of year to get booted outside? I know what you are thinking...you are thinking...enough about the kitty, OK? Well easy for you to say...YOUR not being stalked in your own home, 24/7...by a fur-ball of fangs and claws...from the moment you wake up in the morning, you attempt to get from the bed to the facility in your bare feet...minding your own business...and all of a sudden fangs and claws attack you out from under the bed...then chase you from room to room as you try to get ready for work...then greet you as you come home from work tired and worn out, slashing & clawing...as I'm trying to relax and eat dinner, I'm being attacked from all sides....I'd swear that there is more than one of them in this house...right now, as I type, I am sitting in the lotus position in a chair not meant to be sat in like that...trying to keep my appendages out of striking distance..."Its" the devil incarnate I tell ya...
MR. GIVE, YOU SOOO OWE ME!!!

Late to Work This Morning!

2008-11-19T19:50:00.004-06:00

...guess why!!!

Precious,

pantyhose

and flowing skirt...

DON'T MIX!!!

I'm No Angel...

2008-11-19T19:24:00.003-06:00

I absolutely hate Victoria Secret models!!

Freak'in anorexic biotechs, I'm sure they are total nut jobs to live with.

Deprived of normal people food must put them in the foulest moods.

You would have to reserve mirror time in that house, you know they are always checking themselves out in every mirror, all day, every day...practicing their sappy "come hither" faces and their "I'm too sexy for this photo shoot expressions...blah, poo, yuck...

All that to say...the new Christmas catalog has arrived!!!! YEA!!!

I will place it strategically in the house (under the remote control or in the bathroom) where Mr. Give can't miss it, nor my subtle notations in the margins....heeheehee

Mr. Give Came...

2008-11-18T21:12:00.004-06:00

...home for the weekend....

and boy is my arm tired!!!

I'll work out for our next bout...your @ss is mine!!!

...Son, you're wearing a panty on your head...

2008-11-18T21:02:00.002-06:00

I've always wanted to say that!!!

Now you two settle down in there and get to bed...you've got school tomorrow! Kids...

"Precious" is Getting De-Clawed - NOW!!!

2008-11-18T20:16:00.004-06:00

...and I'm not talk'in a trip to a veterinarian’s office where they have antiseptic, antibiotics and drugs...I'm talk'in right here - right now!!!
With a pair of leather gloves for me and a pair of pliers for "It"...

"It" DOSN'T shred the Mommy's skin, or else "It" get's the hose again!!!

Someone call the Fashion Police - Quick

2008-11-18T20:00:00.005-06:00

Fashion Faux Pas...Guilty! My daughter would have totally disowned me today...I wore black boots, dark blue dress pants, a black camisole with a short black jacket. I was told numerous times that I looked nice, but the more I thought about it, I bet everyone thought that I got dressed in the dark!

Hairball from HELL!!!

2008-11-11T17:10:00.003-06:00

OK Seriously...I'm going to have to name this thing soon because the names I am calling it would make my GranMa break out the soap...I can't call him "Precious" because the barn cats (aka: the Bloods) will kick his furry little behind! I brought one of the pasture kitties (aka: the Krips) [a sweet little girl that was a really good mama before we got her fixed] into the house to see if she would adopt this fluffy little feline...one look at each other and they both puffed up like a couple of blow-fish and started hissing and spitting, doing the sideways, I'm so going to kick your ass dance...so the Krip kitty got booted outside and it's just me and the hell-ion...This creature thinks that I'm it's Mama...and this kitty's got claws...Last night I was laying on the couch, talking on the phone while the mini-monster was clawing its way up and down the length of me with such glee that it wasn't even aware that it was me that was responsible for it landing on the other side of the room so suddenly...So I take a trip to Wally World today and spend $40 in stupid kitty toys to occupy this creature’s energy...but no...as I type, the tiny terror is pouncing upon my back, attacking my toes, or climbing my leg...by the time Mr. Give gets home this weekend...I may surprise him with a new recipe...Kitty-On-A-Stick!!!

Legal LSD ! ? ! ? ! ?

2008-11-11T15:13:00.005-06:00

Salvia Divinorum: Is the strongest natural hallucinogen known to man and it's LEGAL in the State of Texas, all you have to do is find an 18 year old to purchase it on your behalf, oh and the salvia website suggests that you have a "sitter" or responsible person present to keep an eye on your trip'in ass and to remove all sharp objects from your direct vicinity...just lay back and enjoy...Parents be warned and educate yourselves!!! Seriously!!! Yikes!!! I've turned into such a kill-joy!!! Really, it's OK if you want to do it...just keep it away from the amateurs...I mean, the youts...

Let the "Fellowship" Begin...

2008-11-11T14:47:00.002-06:00

...everyone turn and greet your neighbor...could be a little creepy at the Fellowship Church in Grapevine next Sunday. This weekend kicks off their "Seven Days of Sex" campaign. I'm afraid that my creative imagination might run amuck during Sunday service and sexually vivid visuals of my fellow pew mates would start dancing through my head...the last thing I want to visualize during my Sunday morning service experience is Old Widow Jenkins in her granny panties...I'm afraid that my running screaming from the building might disrupt the services...a therapist's feeding frenzy...

Veterans Day

2008-11-11T14:19:00.004-06:00

...the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month...

In honor of all the ones to serve this wonderful nation, your selflessness and sacrifices are not taken for granted or forgotten.

We are forever indebted...stand proud!

Thank You!!!

Success!!!

2008-11-09T14:45:00.002-06:00

"Precious" has found and correctly used the litter box!!!'

Whoo-Hoo!!!

What a glorious day!!!

Now if I can just keep "it" from playing with the computer cords...

Stupid Kitty!!!

Sooo...

2008-11-09T14:08:00.003-06:00

...how did you spend your Saturday night?

Mr. Give is still away on business so I spent my Saturday night alone...comforting our new little bundle of joy!!!

No, not that kind of bundle!

We are the proud parents of a 5 week old bob-tail kitten! Cute little fella but boy is he vocal..."Precious" is sleeping at the moment, worn out from keeping my ass up all night!

Believe me; I wake "Mr. Precious" up every opportunity I get...little shit!

Official Democratic Doggie Debate

2008-11-09T13:54:00.002-06:00

Barack Obama has promised that he will adopt a dog for his daughters when they move into the White House. Why does the "1st Family" always include a dog? Don't get me wrong, I am sooo a dog person...but we never hear about the "1st Ferret", or the "1st Goldfish", the "1st Hamster", the "1st Pony", the "1st Parrot"....(could be interesting if it were a talking parrot)...

OK--Enough of the Political BS

2008-11-07T21:51:00.008-06:00

Time to stop being the proverbial
"Turd in the Punchbowl"...

It's Friday night...
I'm thankful that I have a job...
a wonderful Mr. Give...
a loving family and the freedom to voice my humble opinion
without fear of losing my head (literally)...
we live in a great country &
how much damage can one man do in four years...

Sorry 'bout that....I digress...

back to the Friday night, weekend mode...

Celebrate Good Times...

Whoo-Hoo....da,da,da,da,da,da,da

(oh, now thats just not right) heeheehee

Rolling Over...

2008-11-07T21:41:00.003-06:00

That wasn't an earthquake....that was our fore-fathers rolling over in their graves...they really worked hard on the Constitution of the United States...
it was written in black & white... not Red like OHB's politics...

Democratic Line Dancing...

2008-11-07T21:29:00.006-06:00

'nuff said...

or maybe your into syncronized skating...

same thing, only different...ye gads!!!

Oprah Leaves a Slug Trail...

2008-11-07T20:47:00.002-06:00

...along with the rest of the zombies under the influence of the BHO Kool-Aide, strait to the White House. A slip-and-slide right into the Liberal Lake of Lackers Legitimacy and Entitlement...I think I'm going to be ill.