Brrrrrrr...

I froze my chee-chees off last night! I refuse to turn on the heat in the house just yet & Mr. Give is out of town on business, so I had no where to put my cold feet. I woke up this morning in my warm cocoon, layered in piles of blankets, and wallered in the warmth until I thought that my bladder would burst. When I couldn't stand it any longer, I streaked to the leu only to find that the porcelain throne was a freak'in 20 degrees to the touch!! What a rude awakening, I swear that if my rear end had been wet I would have stuck to the throne like that "double dog dare" kid with his tongue stuck to the flagpole in the middle of the school playground. Then who would I call to rescue me? Who is that true a friend to see me in a position like that and not break out the camera phone to capture the moment...or cost me my retirement fund in blackmail fees for the rest of my life? Learning to "hover" at one's own house really sucks!